Family History - Stories of Grandpa Danny [Part 2]

We always lived far enough away from my father's family that when any of them would come over to visit it was always a special treat. One thing that would almost always happen is we would hear great stories about what it was like to grow up on Bacigalupi Dr., racing down Cardboard Hill, or building makeshift explosives, or sending sisters down hills in home-made go-carts.

The last several times we've been visited I've had the distinct impression to record these stories and to direct the conversation around my grandfather Danny. Grampa Danny passed away when my dad was only 17 so I have never met him and have a strong interest in who he was.

The following is the second part of a transcript of when my Uncle Joe and Aunt Lisa came to visit on September 27th, 2017. You can read the first part by clicking here. (If you would like to listen to the original recording you can do so by clicking here [be warned though that it is not a perfect recording])

Steve: So you guys know, we lived on Bacigalupi, and um, the Dane's were next door. They ended up calling that neighborhood, and our Stake, they called it Mormonville because there were like six Mormon families in that neighborhood.

Lisa: Wooooaaaahhhh.... There was a lot.

Steve: Yeah. There was a lot!

Lisa: It was a big deal!

Steve: But the Dane's were next door and they had kids that were about our same age.

Lisa: I babysat for them.

Steve: Right.

Lisa: Bobby was the, was Bobby the oldest or Macie?

Steve: Uh... Lisa was the oldest.

Lisa: I think so, yeah.

Steve: I can't remember. But Bobby and Blake were my age, they were the twins.

Lisa: And Bobby and Lisa I think were Ricky and Valerie's age?

Steve: Yeah... But great kids. And they ended up moving, they weren't our next door neighbors the whole time, they ended up getting a bigger house because they had more -

Lisa: They moved to Seatle Washington.

Steve: Yeah eventually, they moved just down, they bought another two-story house in Bellwood, and then they moved to -

Lisa: Did they really? See I had lost track of them when we by the time we got married they were gone. And they moved I had lost track of them, and then the tap on the shoulder, you know?

Steve: That's amazing! I didn't know that.

Lisa: Moved, again a tap on the shoulder and there he was. But um, I used to babysit them for four kids for 35 cents an hour, bathing them feeding them and putting them all to bed, for 35 cents an hour. I moved it up to 50 cents.

Steve: Whoa ho ho!

Lisa: Yeah there were lots of Mormons in that neighborhood.

Steve: Yeah. But we lived, what Lisa's saying, we lived across the street from the hill.

Lisa: Cardboard hill...

Steve: And that was a place we could go and have adventures.

Lisa: And it was great.

Steve: But Dad would take us on hikes. I don't know, I remember going on a couple of hikes where we'd go up towards -

Lisa: I didn't ever hike. I ran with Dad. Dad would run down and up around the park, and he and I would run, I'd come up when we were married. In fact, Dad was going through cancer treatments throwing up and I was pregnant sick throwing up. He and I went running together and we kept stopping and throwing up in the gutter. We made it around and we're just like, ugh.... Yeah. But um, yeah I don't think I ever went on hikes with Dad up there, but maybe, you know, the kids.

Steve: Yeah.

Lisa: But that was a great neighborhood. I loved that.

Steve: It was a great place to grow up.

Andrew: What about discipline?

Lisa: Oh... I had the belt. Did you ever have the belt?

Steve: Um, yeah I got the belt, and I told you guys the story about flippin' off .... flippin' off... no?

Andrew: I've heard that story.

Lisa: Who did you flip off? Ooooh... 

Steve: Do you remember?

Lisa: I do remember you telling me.....

Andrew: In church.

Lisa: Oooh in church?! Haha! Oh Steven! Haha...

Steve: So... yeah Daniel and I....

Andrew: That's how all the stories start!

Lisa: Daniel and I!

Steve: Yeah Daniel and I, we were not... we were mischievous, is a nice way of sayin' it. But um, so there was a lot of kids in the family, and Dad - They joined the church in 1970, or '71...

Lisa: Yup, August 8th, 1970.

Steve: 1970. And within like three or four years Dad was in church leadership and so through the 70's he was in bishoprics and Mom was then in charge of getting all the kids to church. And... But anyway, previously we had a, we had a neighbor named Roger Lamborn and he was, uh, rough around the edges. I don't know a good way of sayin' it.

Lisa: That's a good way.

Steve: But he taught everybody how to swear, and he taught people how to flip off, and all those things. So we saw that it got a rise out of Mom when Roger rode by on his bike once and flipped us off, or somethin' like that.

Lisa: You didn't know what it meant.

Steve: We didn't know what it meant. So um, turns out Dad didn't know what it meant either.

Lisa: Ooooh...

Steve: But, we knew that he knew it was bad. But anyway, so we, Daniel and I go to church knowing this little secret, and Mom pulls us into the back row of the church with Kirk and Moreen, we were a little bit late, and Dad's sitting on the stand. And the Bishop stands up and he's at the pulpit and Daniel and I look at each other... Waaaaaahhhhhhh! [gesturing] in the back of the church! And you see Dad up there going ... [wide eyed glarring] like this and Mom looks over and just freaks out. You know, she jumps all over us and she's not, she's not quiet, you know? It's not one of those quiet things. Anyway, so it was a big scene and Daniel and I were like "yeah!" Anyway... 

Lisa: Haha love it!

Candice: I had a kid in our ward growing up that had Aspergers and he'd stand up in sacrament meeting and yell the "F-word", and then just sit back down...

Steve: And I didn't have Aspergers, we just knew it was gonna be fun...

Lisa: You just did it!

Steve: So anyway, we would go get in the way back in the station wagon and the car is totally silent on the way back from sacrament meeting...

Joe: You knew you were in trouble.

Steve: We knew we were in deep crap. So anyway we get home and Dad says "go to your room" and so we're just sitting. We had a... well anyway I'm sitting on the bed and it's a little kid room.

Lisa: Is this your dinosaur room?

Steve: This is our dinosaur room.

Lisa: Dinosaur bunk bed.

Steve: Innocent little kids is the picture I'm trying to paint... and we didn't have any idea what was going on, but anyway Dad comes in. And he looks at us, he looks and Daniel and I, and he goes "do you boys know what you did?" And we're like, ".... no...." He goes "do you know what that means?" and we're like "no" and he goes, "It means something about your mother..."

Everyone: [Laughing]

Steve: He didn't know! "Give me your hand!" And he puts his hand out like this, and then WHAM WHAM he slapped our hands a bunch of times. Oh man... Both of us got majorly tagged on our hands and never flipped anybody off again.

Lisa: Oh man. I was in second grade, and I, we lived in a cul-de-sac on Santa Rosa Court. I had the only Ken doll of all the girls and so the only time their Barbies could get married was if I came and got invited with my Ken doll. And so I was super popular, you know? And I had power. Well one day another girl got a Ken doll and they were all next door on her lawn playing and they didn't invite me. And so I was super mad and I'm out there and they're like "we're not going to invite you we got another Ken doll" and I was like so mad, so I'm like I'm gonna say something big I'm gonna say something bad... and Dad's out working on the car in the driveway and I yelled the "F-word" as loud as I can because I knew it was wad, it was the worst word I could think of! And next thing I know my hand is getting whipped, I'm in the bathroom with a giant bar of soap. And I'm like [gagging] and I didn't know what I'd said I just knew it was big and it was bad. And then I foaming out and I was crying and I remember going back outside and Dad made me go over and apologize. I'm standing by the fence and I'm like "I'm sorry" and they're all like [giggling] a bunch of mean girls! Yeah, oh my gosh. And then we had the belt. Dad would just walk down the hallway and start pulling it off and then SNAP it. And I would be in fear. Fear. And so one time I took towels and a pie tin and I stuck it, because he'd spank us bare butt, and I stuck it in my pants and he didn't, he didn't do bare butt on the girls it was bare butt on the boys. And I had the pie tin and it was with his hand that time. Ca ching! And he started... I think he laughed... and he took it out and smacked me on the butt and I remember I was so mad.

Steve: Oh my gosh.

Lisa: But then he quit doing the belt. Oh! We moved to Bacigalupi, I was always getting in trouble for my mouth, mouthing off. And I was in my room and he stood there in the corner, I was in the corner by my door by the end of my bed, and it was hot. And he was talking, "Lisa Rae, you need to watch your mouth" and he's, you know, doing this to me [tapping on the forehead with each word] and I passed out. He would tap me on the forehead.

Andrew: He would tap you on the forehead?

Lisa: Yeah, "You. Need. To..." and I passed out. Scared him to death! When I woke up I'm laying on the bed and he's like "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry!"

Steve: Afraid he'd hurt you!

Lisa: I'd just like completely, I couldn't breathe, it was stuffy and he was in my face and I was like, ugh... and I passed out. And he never really disciplined me much after that. You know, telling me to watch my mouth.

Andrew: That's your defense mechanism. Pass out once and you're done!

Lisa: Passin' out, it worked.

Steve: I don't remember any other time of getting... Mom was the one that would, well she would beat the crap out of us. But...

Lisa: Oh! Did she, I, we had the spoon. She'd chase us down the hallway. Or she was connected to the phone going [snapping fingers].

Steve: Yes. Yes. Yes.

Lisa: But, so, did she smack you guys?

Steve: Oh yeah. Big time.

Andrew: Anthony brags about the number of spoons that have been broken on his behind.

Steve: Right. But she was like the primary out-of-anger discipliner, but Dad would always, there was some calm to it. And the only time I remember is getting my hand slapped. Oh, and my mouth flicked.

Lisa: Ooh, I hated that. I hated getting my mouth flicked.

Steve: Yeah, for me it was, you know, the safe-ish swear words and just back talking to both of them, constantly.

Lisa: Did you talk back to Dad?

Steve: Oh yeah. Totally, both of them.

Lisa: Oh, I did never talk back to Dad. Mom... and I would tell him! "She doesn't make any sense! This just doesn't make any sense, it's irrational!" but he'd say "You always, Lisa Rae, you always obey your mother, you never go against what she has to say" and he'd back her up. And I'm like, "you're backing her up, and she's out of control!"

Steve: She's nuts! Right! Exactly, that's what I would get in trouble for. Back talking mom.

Lisa: Cause' I'm like "that doesn't make any sense!" Yeah backtalking, that's when I got older is backtalking.

Steve: Yeah.

Ashley: So he was very supportive then of his wife.

Lisa: Yes, 'cause that was the era, that was the total era...... But I always hung out with Dad more.

Steve: Yeah.

Lisa: I wasn't around Mom that much.

-TO BE CONTINUED-